So our morning started out when L woke up at 7:45. She never wakes up this early, but we took advantage of it and got ready for the zoo. We left our house at 9:00, perfect for the 1 1/2 hour drive to get there. We figured we'd be there by 10:30, get a decent 2 hours there before leaving to grab lunch on our way home. As usual we were W-R-O-N-G.
We were in the middle of nowhere 40 minutes away from Lansing when Layla said she needed to use the potty. This was her first long car trip in underwear and I didn't want her to be upset because she had an accident. So Bryan pushed a little harder on the gas pedal so we could make it to the nearest town a little quicker (5 miles). I turned around to tell her "hold it!" and she pukes EVERYWHERE. So, I unbuckle my seatbelt and throw my pregnant self in the backseat to help her. Poor thing was SO upset that she threw up on her blankie that she didn't seem to care she also threw up on her shirt, shorts, carseat and all the extra blankets we had in the car. We finally get into town, get her cleaned up, get her car seat as clean as possible and make a trip to Family Dollar for a new shirt and blanket. The only thing they had was long sleeved PJs and a boys blanket. Fab.
I have to write that L wasn't sick...she's on a lot of meds for her digestive issues and they just happened to upset her stomach that morning. So on to the zoo we go...
So we arrive in Lansing and Bryan realizes "oops, I didn't put the address to the zoo into GoogleMap...we are just driving into Lansing". Soooooo after a 10 minutes detour we finally get to the zoo. I must add that I am just realizing this is the capital of MI (what a world I live in to not even know this...but honestly who cares?) and we decided that it is Michigan State, not Michigan that is in Lansing because "Ann Arbor is a whore". Right, all that Illini merchandise paid off!
So we get to the zoo and first things first, we have to find L a short sleeved shirt to wear! So she got a pink zoo shirt that is a size too big, our only option. After spending approximately three thousand dollars now on this seemingly "free" trip (we have a zoo pass) we had $2 in cash left. Bryan and L shared a Gatorade and now we have no dollars left.
One of the first things we got to see where the lions. They were pretty cool, got to see them super close and one was awake and looking at Layla as if she were a snack. Awesome, L loved that (seriously). We stood there for awhile so the lioness could drool over our toddler when all of a sudden a bunny hops through the cage!! I thought to myself "this is it...we have been through puking, shirt changes, the heat, screaming for a snack and no real choo choo train here...and this is going to be what L remembers most- this lion ripping this bunny to pieces". We left the lion exhibit and moved to something safer, the birds.
But of course, these birds were no usual birds. And L wants to feed the them. So I scrape the bottom of my purse (practically looking on the ground for pennies at this point) and come up with a $1 so she can do that. These birds were INTENSE. One bit Bryan and he proceed to act like such a baby that I think we scared all of the other families out of the cage (just kidding...but he did kind of squeal when it happened). The Bartons being the only one in the cage = crazy bomb diving birds coming for L's food stick:
But she liked it! I wish I would have gotten a good video of one landing on her shoulder though, it was hilarious.
Here are a few other pictures of us just roaming around:
We were so exhausted. It was 91 degrees outside (300 degrees to a pregnant women) and just mentally exhausted from all the discoveries we had to make on the way there. We pretty much rushed the zoo and left by 2:30 so we could eat lunch and get back. About 5 miles away from the nearest bathroom L suddenly has to go again. Fabulous. So we end up going to the same gas station where we had just spent 20 minutes cleaning her up that morning. This will be quick right?
Nope. Bryan takes L to the mens while Mommy goes into the girls. I came out and waited for, I kid you not, 30 minutes. Of course, I'm scared she's puking again and really was sick but FINALLY L comes flying out of the bathroom screaming for everyone to hear "MOMMMY!!! I POOPED IN THE NICE POTTY!!!!!". Fantastic, now we can be on our way. We walk out of the gas station through a little diner that they had. L singles out a couple enjoying some strawberry short cake and tells them "my poopie stinks". My face turns bright red, we get out to the car and Bryan and I just start busting up laughing.
There is NEVER...EVER a dull moment in this family. I don't know how all this drama and hilarity always seems to make it's way into everything we do. I'm beginning to think that we are cursed and will never have normal family events like other people. But I do know that we have TONS and TONS of hilarious stories to share. So that makes it worth all the puke, embarrassment and an almost dead "Easter Bunny". Right?
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